| why am i crying for? who am i crying for? i really dont know. is it becoz i had been thinking and worrying too much? or is it becoz i'm feeling so empty? or what?? maybe i know the reasons, but just running away from it bah. maybe i shldnt be worrying so much about so many things. planning for tomorrow is time well spent, but worrying about tomorrow is time wasted. "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life." this is true. we worried so much everyday, but yet we dont earn back a single thing at all. come to think of it, worrying so much for what, worrying is natural, but it's not healthy. coz when we worry we make our faith appear meaningless. "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." worrying too much only lead to more white hairs hahaha! fri after sch, went home changed then went amk hub with yongjun. haha once reach there, i suddenly got strong feeling will see some familiar ppl there. then suddenly jieming appear with 2 other ladies. haha they 3 eating in subway. after that also saw alot more opss ppl. ard 5, went home le. grab my stuffs then 6 went out again to meet joel and daryl for dinner. i was officially step down ytd, the new Deputy Company Sergeant Major for 2007 is Joel Heng!! comgratz. haha the sec 3s, only the new CSM and DY promoted to Sgt, the rest will be promoted the next promotion ceremony. all the sec 4s who once qualified as FAA too, were all promoted to Staff, shaorui and me were the only 2 promoted to warrant =) haha the warrant rank was out of stock when i went down to hq this thurs with joel. so sir james give us the BB red sash logo as a replacement. but he will give us the rank asap. also, the sec 4s finally got out SPS!!! haha. joel and i were supposed to go yishun mrt to meet shaorui they all at 4.15. but i wont be going with them, coz i meeting daryl at 5. we reached there at 4.40 coz waited for the bus very long, then when we were at the mrt underground escalator, i was telling joel they all there le, we were late. joel : i bet with u they not there. once we reached there, no one was there -.- so i called shaorui, he say he at foodcourt there. so i tell him that they go themselves le. lucy joel was with me, if not joel will be at mrt there thinking where are the rest. weishen didnt go, coz of some family prob, so he last min ask me find replacement. so i ask baldovin along loh. 5pm daryl come le, took mrt to yio chu kang to meet nicky and rachel. then went to city hall to meet michelle and irene they all. we were at the mrt the map there, then suddenly i saw a black shirt guy so familiar walk pass us, shaorui -.- then joel was like where where. then after that he stand there look at them and goes "ooohhhh..." he was actually looking at yingshi, not shaorui lah. went to bk to eat, daryl called chun kiat at bk. daryl: where u? chun kiat:mrt. daryl: mrt where?? chun kiat: mrt de escalator. daryl: .......... nvm we at bk, bye. haha chun kiat got a monotone de loh. ytd during parade when we were at basketball court, i heard a voice coming from naval base pri. then i was thinking, is it daryl's voice?? impossible lah, coz i heard he shout command before. then is it sir eng kiat??? also impossible lah. so i know it must be chun kiat de. haha. went into the theatre at 7.15. the concert was nice and it ends at around 9. after that the teachers got special items for mr low, haha they sing song. then ending part, mr jimmy lim solo. after concert, we went outside, took some photos, then went up find teachers. chang da, daryl, baldovin and the rest went to old market to eat with mr cheo and other teachers. jieming, me and joel went to raffles take mrt home. at that point of time, i was already very very tired, coz the previous night slept for 4 hours only. joel kept saying i emo kid emo kid. haha im tired okay, not emo. u then emo loh, ppl all lie down sleep, u at one corner hide in your sleeping bag sleep. and DY!!!! work hard hor!!!!! haha. next mon got speech day parade rehersal, joel and keeching will be the outstanding ones. coz all of us will wear field rank with our ranks, but they wearing red colour field rank which is the CSMs field rank. they are the first batch to start de. then for me and shaorui, no field rank at all. coz warrant officer no field rank de -.- okie, i want watch cd le, then later pia hw, 4pm maybe soccer?? see if i can pia finish not first ^ ^ shld i just let it go?? even if i do, that feeling wont just fade away. it still remains. shld i go for it??? i wanted to, but im always indecisive. i always thinks that i dont have any courage to do anything. maybe this is why i always fails to suceed. what shld i do =( |
| yay! this week is really quite free. mon when i woke up, i rmbed that i havent do my eng compre. then i was hoping that mr pang never come, if not i die. then during morning assembly, "teachers not in school today, Mr Pang Han Tong" heng arh!! ytd first 3 periods free, coz mdm ang go SYF, then mr pang never come again, but i got do eng compre ^ ^ then first time tuesday no remedial!!! haha. reached home, both baldovin and daryl sms me. haha daryl wanna ask me go movie, so we went j8 watch the reaping loh. haha this is my very first NC16 movie that i watched!!! at first i dont even know what the story is about, i only thought is horror. its actually about christianity de, the woman last time believe in God, but after her husband and daughter died, she didnt believe anymore. its a very interesting show lah, so can go watch. but u MUST be 16 and above HAHA! today last 3 periods free, mr chua came in 3rd last period, say he not teaching then give us a worksheet ask us do. then after a while he left le. i completed the bio wksht, alot sia. then bio 2nd period i do finish eng wksht given by mr pang earlier this morning, coz his period is last period, then he also going victoria theatre today. last period, i went to 4s1 to slack, around 2pm i went back my class, only a few ppl left -.- after sch got NCOC meeting, this is the meeting to vote for the new councils, coz this sat is the last parade before midyear exams, then also last parade for sec 4s, we will take study leave from BB le. so stepping down this sat. finally can get SPS le!!! waited for it so long liao, haiz... but can only wear it when i step down and during next week de speech day parade. there will be promotion too!!!!! =) hope can be promoted to the final rank ^ ^ haha linchuan was so happy when he heard promotion, first thing he say is "Waaa, finally can wear cross-belt at speech day le" haha. anyway good luck to the new NCOCs, lead well, work hand in hand, and achieve the JM Fraser Gold Honour Roll next year!!!! i will come back 3rd Nov if there is parade on that day, coz my o lvl ends 2nd Nov!!!!!! haha cant wait to go back to BB loh. hope i can achieve the results i want for my o lvl, i rather my 2 relevant subs be my best 2, haha like that easier loh, if 2 relevant is worst 2 then die le. i target is to score b3 for my eng!!! POSSIBLE?? yes, if i work hard =) then 2 relevant subs score A1 and A2!!!! POSSIBLE????? work hard loh. then best 2 also A1 and A2!!!! POSSIBLE??????? hope so, work hard loh! target E1R2B2 : 9, POSSIBLE??? i must believe in myself =) haha i rmbed i told myself i dont wanna study university de, but after asking daryl about it, i decided maybe i wanna study SMU!!! but i think i finish university already 25 le haha. nvm la, foward-looking policy mah, must plan for future!! haha. |
| Little Wonders by Rob Thomas Let it go, Let it roll right off your shoulder Don’t you know The hardest part is over Let it in, Let your clarity define you In the end We will only just remember how it feels Our lives are made In these small hours These little wonders, These twists & turns to fate Time falls away, But these small hours, These small hours still remain Let it slide, Let your troubles fall behind you Let it shine Until you feel it all around you And i don’t mind If it’s me you need to turn to We’ll get by, It’s the heart that really matters in the end Our lives are made In these small hours These little wonders, These twists & turns to fate Time falls away, But these small hours, These small hours still remain All of my regret Will wash away some how But i can not forget The way i feel right now In these small hours These little wonders These twists & turns to fate These twists & turns to fate Time falls away but these small hours These small hours, still remain, Still remain These little wonders These twists & turns to fate Time falls away But these small hours These little wonders still remain |
| i was just thinking about what were the things that happaned around me recently. i cant control and tears just simply roll down my face =( things had seriously changed alot, which saddens me. am i the one who caused all these?? i dont know. maybe im the idiot who caused the changes. now i just hope that God can forgive whatever things i did, and also heal my broken heart. |